Come on ol' mate...

Image by: greenweddingshoes.com

Do you have a fiance that wants to help plan your big day? Or is he more.."Oh babe, you will plan the most beautiful day"?

While watching Home and Away last night... (yes... Home and Away! I think I secretly enjoy that show)... They were discussing how one of the characters fiancés isn't helping at all. His idea was that he wanted for her to have the most perfect day and the only way she would have that, is if she planned the entire thing her self... Her thoughts were quite the opposite! 

We have stumbled across some tips to help with this... ps. Don't forget the simple rule - Men are from Mars and women are from Venus! 


Coping with an Apathetic Fiance

Don’t take it personally—If your fiance seems uninterested in you, that is a problem. But if your fiance merely seems uninterested in the details of the wedding, don’t worry too much. Some people simply aren’t wired to be as excited or opinionated about aesthetics, tradition, or ceremony. Your fiance isn’t trying to hurt you—he or she may just feel overwhelmed by the process.

Keep perspective—Weddings are beautiful things: a public expression of the love shared between you and your fiance. But weddings are also temporary in nature. Don’t let the chaos of planning a wedding distract you from what is most important: planning a life together.

Communicate—Help your partner understand why the wedding details matter to you. Give your fiance grace to not feel as passionately about the actual wedding as you do. But let him or her know that you still need their emotional (and sometimes logistical) support.

Assign tasks—Sit down with your fiance and a list of wedding responsibilities. Then ask your fiance what tasks he or she would like to tackle. Men are often most comfortable helping out in the areas of food and music/entertainment.

Prioritise your need for input—Few men truly care about the color of the napkins, flowers, or bridesmaids’ dresses. Don’t demand input from your fiance on every single detail. If you really need input from him/her, try narrowing down the options first. Then present him/her with a couple of choices. Just be prepared to live with your fiance’s decision. No one likes to be asked his/her opinion and promptly have that opinion dismissed.

Find external support—While your fiance may not think wedding planning is fun, plenty of other people are usually happy to lend a hand. Reach out to your friends, family, and bridal party for support.

Hire a good wedding coordinator—The wedding coordinator is often the first thing people cut from their budget. But a coordinator can take a huge weight off both you and your fiance. You are a lot less likely to become a bridezilla (or groomzilla) if a professional is there to crack the whip for you.

Have date nights—As the wedding approaches, it can be difficult to focus on anything else. Be sure to make room for date nights. Commit to not discussing wedding details during that time. Your fiance probably needs a breather from wedding talk; you probably do too.

Focus on the positive—There is a silver lining for having a fiance who doesn’t enjoy wedding planning: sole creative control. You may think you want your fiance to be more involved in the decision-making. But what if he or she starts giving you input you don’t like? If you have strong opinions about the wedding, having a relatively un-opinionated fiance isn’t necessarily the worst thing.

Your fiance may not care as much as you about the details of your wedding. But so long as he or she truly cares about you, you will be fine. Remember the main objective is not a perfect wedding, but a strong, loving, and lasting marriage.

Awww.. are we all loved up now?

Kassi x